Funnybone 2: Hilarious Collection of Old Age Jokes and Quotes To Keep You Laughing and Young at Heart

by Pearce W Hammond

Overview

If you want to laugh a lot, this book is for you. Funnybone 2 contains a hilarious collection of wild and witty jokes and quotes about old age; hilarious examples of senior moments; funny jokes about age and aging, and much, much, more to keep you laughing and young at heart. All you have to do is sit back, relax, go through the pages in this book and laugh a lot. Here are a few examples: A wife turned to her husband and said, "You don't look anything like the long haired, skinny kid I married 25 years ago. I need a DNA sample to make sure it's still you." What is the best birth control method for really old seniors? Answer: Nudity When you purchase anything online, make sure to check out the seller carefully. I purchased a penis enlarger online for $50 and I received a magnifying glass with instructions that read, "Do Not Use in Sunlight." A couple were watching TV. Her husband had the remote and kept switching back and forth between a fishing channel and a porn channel. His wife became more and more annoyed and finally said, "For God's sake, just leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish!" About the Author - Pearce W. Hammond is an accomplished writer and writes books that make people laugh. He was born and raised in Savannah, Georgia and is the nephew of famed Savannah-born songwriter Johnny Mercer who wrote over 1500 songs and was nominated for an Academy Award for "Best Song" 19 times, more than any other composer. Mr. Mercer won four Academy Awards for "Best Song" for "Moon River", "Days of Wine and Roses", "In the Cool, Cool, Cool of the Evening", and "On the Atchison, Topeka and Santa Fe". Mr. Hammond now resides in Okatie, South Carolina on the banks of the Chechessee River. When not writing books, he is a self-taught artist who uses his special talents to create primitive paintings which are so reflective of scenes from the Gullah Culture in the low country of South Carolina in peaceful times gone by. "Now that I've been around for more than seven decades and have a cow valve implanted in my heart, I decided it was time for me to write another funny book before the cows come home to keep people laughing and young at heart. I hope this book tickles your funnybone and makes you laugh a lot because laughter is needed in this crazy world we live in today."

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781494958770
Publisher:	CreateSpace Publishing
Publication date:	03/02/2014
Edition description:	Large Print
Pages:	180
Product dimensions:	5.51(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.38(d)

About the Author

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
I like to write humorous books and make people laugh. I was born and raised in Savannah, Georgia, and writing is in my blood. My great uncle was famed Savannah-born songwriter, Johnny Mercer, who wrote over 1,500 songs from the 1930's through the 1960's and was nominated for an Academy Award for "Best Song" 19 times, more than any other composer. Johnny Mercer won four Academy Awards for "Best Song" for Moon River, Days of Wine and Roses, In the Cool, Cool, Cool of the evening, and On the Atchison, Topeka, and Santa Fe. He came to Savannah every year to visit family and he encouraged me at an early age to pursue my passion to write and paint.
In addition to my writing, I'm a self-taught artist and paint scenes from the Gullah Culture of South Carolina in peaceful times gone by. I use bright primary colors, acrylic paints, pen and ink and mixed media to depict the Gullah people shrimping, fishing, crabbing, gathering oysters, and living off the land. In my book, "The Gullahs of South Carolina", my purpose was to increase public awareness of the Gullah people and their unique language and culture and to pass along their story so future generations would know the significant contributions they made to America's heritage. The book is illustrated with my original Gullah art.
Today I reside in Okatie, South Carolina with my wife, Anne, on the banks of the Chechessee River.