Three of Diamonds

Three of Diamonds

by Anthony Horowitz
Three of Diamonds

Three of Diamonds

by Anthony Horowitz

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Overview

What would Tim Diamond, the world's worst private detective, dowithout his quick-thinking brother Nick? The bumbling detective and his kid brother are at it again in these three hilarious, fast-paced mysteries. Whether it's finding out who flattened a philanthropist with a steamroller in The Blurred Man, outsmarting Parisian drug smugglers on a vacation gone miserably wrong in The French Confection, or catching the murderer behind a deadly class reunion in I Know What You Did Last Wednesday, there's never a dull moment with this crimesolving duo around. Find out if Nick can get to the bottom of these mysteries before Tim messes everything up, or worse, gets them both killed.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781101664056
Publisher: Penguin Young Readers Group
Publication date: 05/05/2005
Series: The Diamond Brothers
Sold by: Penguin Group
Format: eBook
Pages: 240
Sales rank: 163,891
File size: 629 KB
Age Range: 8 - 12 Years

About the Author

About The Author
Anthony Horowitz is perhaps the busiest writer in England. He has been writing since the age of eight, and professionally since the age of twenty. He writes in a comfortable shed in his garden for up to ten hours per day. In addition to the highly successful Alex Rider ongoing series of books, he has also written episodes of several popular TV crime series, including Poirot, Murder in Mind, Midsomer Murders, and Murder Most Horrid. He has written the television series Foyle's War, which aired in the United States, as well as the libretto of a Broadway musical adapted from Dr. Seuss's book, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T. He penned the script for the film The Gathering, which was released in 2003, starring Christina Ricci. Horowitz has also written the Diamond Brothers series.

Read an Excerpt

SO MUCH FOR A VACATION . . .

We had just reached the window when we heard the scream.

It was like no sound I had ever heard, thin and high and horribly final. The station was huge and noisy but the scream cut through the crowd like a scalpel. Everybody stopped and turned to see where it had come from. Even Tim heard it. “Oh dear,” he said. “It sounds like someone has stepped on a cat.”

Already a police car had arrived and several uniformed guards were hurrying toward the trains. I strained to hear what the crowd was saying. They were speaking French, of course. That didn’t make it any easier.

“What’s happened?”

“It’s terrible. Somebody has fallen under a train.”

“It was a steward. He was on the train from London. He fell off a platform.”

“Is he hurt?”

“He’s dead. Crushed by a train.”

I heard all of it. I understood some of it. I didn’t like any of it. A steward? Off the London train? Somehow I didn’t need to ask his name.

“Tim,” I asked, “what’s the French for murder?”

Tim shrugged. “Why do you want to know?”

“I don’t know.” I stepped onto the escalator and allowed it to carry me down. “I’ve just got a feeling it’s something we’re going to need.”

Three Diamond Brothers Mysteries

BOOKS BY ANTHONY HOROWITZ

The Devil and His Boy

THE ALEX RIDER ADVENTURES

Stormbreaker

Point Blank

Skeleton Key

Eagle Strike

Scorpia

Ark Angel

THE DIAMOND BROTHERS MYSTERIES

Public Enemy Number Two

The Falcon’s Malteser

Three of Diamonds

South By Southeast

Three Diamond Brothers Mysteries

THE BLURRED
MAN

THE PEN PAL

I knew the American was going to mean trouble, the moment he walked through the door. He only made it on the third attempt. It was eleven o’clock in the morning but clearly he’d been drinking since breakfast—and breakfast had probably come out of a bottle, too. The smell of whiskey was so strong it made my eyes water. Drunk at eleven o’clock! I didn’t like to think what it was doing to him, but if I’d been his liver I’d have been applying for a transplant.

He managed to find a seat and slumped into it. The funny thing was, he was quite smartly dressed: a suit and a tie that looked expensive. I got the feeling straightaway that this was someone with money. He was wearing gold-rimmed glasses, and as far as I could tell we were talking real gold. He was about forty years old, with hair that was just turning gray and eyes that were just turning yellow. That must have been the whiskey. He took out a cigarette and lit it. Blue smoke filled the room. This man would not have been a good advertisement for the National Health Service.

“My name is Carter,” he said at last. He spoke with an American accent. “Joe Carter. I just got in from Chicago. And I’ve got a problem.”

“I can see that,” I muttered.

He glanced at me with one eye. The other eye looked somewhere over my shoulder. “Who are you?” he demanded.

“I’m Nick Diamond.”

“I don’t need a smart-aleck kid. I’m looking for a private detective.”

“That’s him over there,” I said, indicating the desk and my big brother, Tim.

“You want a coffee, Mr. Carver?” Tim asked.

“It’s not Carver. It’s Carter. With a t,” the American growled.

“I’m out of tea. How about a hot chocolate?”

“I don’t want a hot anything!” Carter sucked on the cigarette. “I want help. I want to hire you. What do you charge?”

Tim stared. Although it was hard to believe, the American was offering him money. This was something that didn’t happen often. Tim hadn’t really made any money since he’d worked as a policeman, and even then the police dogs had earned more than him. At least they’d bitten the right man. As a private detective, Tim had been a total calamity. I’d helped him solve one or two cases, but most of the time I was stuck at school. Right now it was the week of vacation—six weeks before Christmas, and once again it didn’t look like our stockings were going to be full. Unless you’re talking holes. Tim had just seven cents left in his bank account. We’d written a begging letter to our mom and dad in Australia but were still saving up for the stamp.

I coughed and Tim jerked upright in his chair, trying to look businesslike. “You need a private detective?” he said. “Fine. That’s me. But it’ll cost you fifty a day, plus expenses.”

“You take traveler’s checks?”

“That depends on the traveler.”

“I don’t have cash.”

“Traveler’s checks are fine,” I said.

Joe Carter pulled out a bundle of blue traveler’s checks, then fumbled for a pen. For a moment I was worried that he’d be too drunk to sign them. But somehow he managed to scribble his name five times on the dotted lines, and slid the checks across. “All right,” he said. “That’s five hundred dollars.”

“Five hundred dollars!” Tom squeaked. The last time he’d had that much money in his hand he’d been playing Monopoly. “Five hundred dollars . . .?”

Carter nodded. “Right. So now let me tell you where I’m coming from.”

“I thought you were coming from Chicago,” Tim said.

“I mean, let me tell you my problem. I got into England last Tuesday, a little less than a week ago. I’m staying in a hotel in the West End. The Ritz.”

“You’d be crackers to stay anywhere else,” Tim said.

“Yeah.” Carter stubbed his cigarette out in the ashtray. Except we didn’t have an ashtray. The smell of burning wood rose from the surface of Tim’s desk. “I’m a writer, Mr. Diamond. You may have read some of my books.”

That was unlikely—unless he wrote children’s books. Tim had recently started Lemony Snickett for the fourth time.

“I’m pretty well known in the States,” Carter continued. “The Big Bullet. Death in the Afternoon. Rivers of Blood. Those are some of my titles.”

“Romances?” Tim asked.

“No. They’re crime novels. I’m successful. I make a ton of money out of my writing—but, you know, I believe in sharing it around. I’m not married. I don’t have kids. So I give it to charity. All sorts of charities. Mostly back home in the States, of course, but also in other parts of the world.”

I wondered if he’d like to make a donation to the bankrupt brothers of dumb detectives, a little charity of my own. But I didn’t say anything.

“Now, a couple of years back I heard of a charity operating here in England,” he went on. “It was called Dream Time and I kind of liked the sound of it. Dream Time was there to help kids get more out of life. It bought computers and books and special equipment for schools. It also bought schools. It helped train kids who wanted to get into sports. Or who wanted to paint. Or who had never traveled.” Carter glanced at me. “How old are you, son?” he asked.

“Thirteen,” I said.

“I bet you make wishes sometimes.”

“Yes. But unfortunately Tim is still here.”

“Dream Time would help you. They make wishes come true.” Carter reached into his pocket and took out a hip flask. He unscrewed it and threw it back. It seemed to do him good. “A little Scotch,” he explained.

“I thought you were American,” Tim said.

“I gave Dream Time two million dollars of my money because I believed in them!” Carter exclaimed. “Most of all, I believed in the man behind Dream Time. He was a saint. He was a lovely guy. His name was Lenny Smile.”

I noticed that Carter was talking about Smile in the past tense. I was beginning to see the way this conversation might be going.

“What can I tell you about Lenny?” Carter went on. “Like me, he never married. He didn’t have a big house or a fancy car or anything like that. In fact he lived in a small apartment in a part of London called Battersea. Dream Time had been his idea and he worked for it seven days a week, three hundred and sixty-five days a year. Lenny loved leap years because then he could work three hundred and sixty-six days a year. That was the sort of man he was. When I heard about him, I knew I had to support his work. So I gave him a quarter of a million dollars. And then another quarter. And so on . . .”

“So what’s the problem, Mr. Starter?” Tim asked. “You want your money back?”

“Hell, no! Let me explain. I loved this guy Lenny. I felt like I’d known him all my life. But recently, I decided we ought to meet.”

“You’d never met him?”

“No. We were pen pals. We exchanged letters. Lots of letters—and e-mails. He used to write to me and I’d write back. That’s how I got to know him. But I was busy with my work. And he was busy with his. We never met. We never even spoke. And then, recently, I suddenly realized I needed a break. I’d been working so hard, I decided to come over to England and have a vacation.

“I wrote to Lenny and told him I’d like to meet him. He was really pleased to hear from me. He said he wanted to show me all the work he’d been doing. All the children who’d benefited from the money I’d sent. I was really looking forward to the trip. He was going to meet me at Heathrow Airport.”

“How would you know what he looked like if you’d never met?” I asked.

Carter blushed. “Well, I did sometimes wonder about that. So once I’d arranged to come I asked him to send me a photograph of himself.”

He reached into his jacket and took out a photograph. He handed it to me.

The picture showed a man standing in front of a café in what could have been London or Paris. It was hard to be sure. I could see the words CAFÉ DEBUSSY written on the windows. But the man himself was harder to make out. Whoever had taken the photograph should have asked Dream Time for a new camera. It was completely out of focus. I could just make out a man in a black suit with a full-length coat. He was wearing gloves and a hat. But his face was a blur. He might have had dark hair. I think he was smiling. There was a cat sitting on the pavement between his legs, and the cat was easier to make out than he was.

“It’s not a very good picture,” I said.

“I know.” Carter took it back. “Lenny was a very shy person. He didn’t even sign his letters. That’s how shy he was. He told me that he didn’t like going out very much. You see, there’s something else you need to know about him. He was sick. He had this illness . . . some kind of allergy.”

“Was Algy his doctor?” Tim asked.

“No, no. An allergy. It meant he reacted to things. Peanuts, for example. They made him swell up. And he hated publicity. There have been a couple of stories about him in the newspapers, but he wouldn’t give interviews and there were never any photographs. The Queen wanted to knight him, apparently, but sadly he was also allergic to queens. All that mattered to him was his work . . . Dream Time . . . helping kids. Anyway, meeting him was going to be the biggest moment of my life . . . I was as excited as a schoolboy.”

As excited as a schoolboy? Obviously Carter had never visited my school.

“Only when I got to Heathrow, Lenny wasn’t there. He wasn’t in London either. I never got to meet him. And you know why?”

I knew why. But I waited for Lenny to tell us.

“Lenny was buried the day before I arrived,” Carter said.

“Buried?” Tim exclaimed. “Why?”

“Because it was his funeral, Mr. Diamond!” Carter lit another cigarette. “He was dead. And that’s why I’m here. I want you to find out what happened.”

“What did happen?” I asked.

“Well, like I told you, I arrived here at Heathrow last Tuesday. All I could think about was meeting Lenny Smile, shaking that man’s hand and telling him just how much he meant to me. When he didn’t show up, I didn’t even check into my hotel. I went straight to the offices of Dream Time. And that was when they told me . . .”

“Who told you?” I asked.

“A man called Hoover. Rodney Hoover . . .”

“That name sucks,” Tim said.

Carter ignored him. “He worked for Lenny, helping him run Dream Time. There’s another assistant there, too, called Fiona Lee. She’s very posh. Upper-class, you know? They have an office just the other side of Battersea Bridge. It’s right over the café you saw in that photo. Anyway, it seems that just a few days after I e-mailed Lenny to tell him I was coming, he got killed in a horrible accident, crossing the road.”

“He fell down a manhole?” Tim asked.

“No, Mr. Diamond. He got run over. Hoover and Lee actually saw it happen. If they hadn’t been there, the police wouldn’t even have known it was Lenny.”

“Why is that?”

“Because he was run over by a steamroller.” Carter shuddered. Tim shivered. Even the desk light flickered. I had to admit, it was a pretty horrible way to go. “He was flattened,” the American went on. “They told me that the ambulance people had to fold him before they could get him onto a stretcher. He was buried last week. At Brompton Cemetery, near Fulham.”

Brompton. That was where the master criminal known as the Falcon had been buried, too. Tim and I had gone to the cemetery at the end of our first ever case.* We were lucky we weren’t still there.

“This guy Rodney Hoover tells me he’s winding down Dream Time,” Carter went on. “He says it wouldn’t be the same without Lenny, and he doesn’t have the heart to go on without him. I had a long talk with him in his office and I have to tell you . . . I didn’t like it.”

“You don’t think it’s a nice office?” Tim asked.

“I think something strange is going on.”

Tim blinked. “What exactly do you think is strange?”

Carter almost choked on his cigarette. “Damnit!” he yelled. “You don’t think there’s anything unusual in a guy getting run over by a steamroller? It happens in the middle of the night and just a few days before he’s due to have a meeting with someone who’s given him two million dollars! And the next thing you hear, the charity he’d set up is suddenly shutting down! You don’t think that’s all a little strange?”

“It’s certainly strange that it happened in the middle of the night,” Tim agreed. “Why wasn’t he in bed?”

“I don’t know why he wasn’t in bed—but I’ll tell you this: I think he was murdered. A man doesn’t walk in front of a steamroller. But maybe he’s pushed. Maybe this has got something to do with money . . . my money. Maybe somebody didn’t want us to meet! I know that if I was writing this as a novel, that’s the way it would turn out. Anyway, there are plenty of private detectives in London. If you’re not interested, I can find someone who is. So are you going to look into this for me or not?”

Tim glanced at the traveler’s checks. He scooped them up. “Don’t worry, Mr. Carpark,” he said. “I’ll find the truth. The only question is—where do I find you?”

“I’m still at the Ritz,” Carter said. “Ask for Room eight.”

“I’ll ask for you,” Tim said. “But if you’re out, I suppose the roommate will have to do.

*  *  *

We changed the traveler’s checks into cash and blew some of it on the first decent meal we’d had in a week. Tim was in a good mood. He even let me have a dessert.

“I can’t believe it!” he exclaimed as the waitress served us two ice cream sundaes. The service in the restaurant was so slow that they were more like Mondays by the time they arrived. “Five hundred dollars! That’s more money than I’ve earned in a month.”

“It’s more money than you’ve earned in a year,” I reminded him.

“And all because some crazy American thinks his pen pal was murdered.”

“How do you know he wasn’t?”

“Intuition.” Tim tapped the side of his nose. “I can’t explain it to you, kid. I’ve just got a feeling.”

“You’ve also got ice cream on your nose,” I said.

After lunch we took the bus over to Fulham. I don’t know why Tim decided to start in Brompton Cemetery. Maybe he wanted to visit it for old times’ sake. It had been more than a year since we’d last been there, but the place hadn’t changed. And why should it have? I doubted any of the residents had complained. None of them would have had the energy to redecorate. The gravestones were as weird as ever, some of them like Victorian telephone boxes, others like miniature castles with doors fastened by rusting chains and padlocks. You’d have needed a skeleton key to open them. The place was divided into separate areas: some old, some more modern. There must have been thousands of people there, but of course none of them offered to show us the way to Smile’s grave. We had to find it on our own.

It took us about an hour. It was on the edge of the cemetery, overshadowed by the football stadium next door. We might never have found it except that the grave had been recently dug. That was one clue. And there were fresh flowers. That was another. Smile had been given a lot of flowers. In fact, if he hadn’t been dead he could have opened a florist’s. I read the gravestone:

LENNY SMILE

APRIL 31st 1955—NOVEMBER 11th 2001
A WONDERFUL MAN, CALLED TO REST.

We stood in silence for a moment. It seemed too bad that someone who had done so much for children all over the world hadn’t even made it to fifty. I glanced at the biggest bunch of flowers on the grave. There was a card attached. It was signed in green ink, With love, from Rodney Hoover and Fiona Lee.

There was a movement on the other side of the cemetery. I had thought we were alone when we arrived, but now I realized that there was a man, watching us. He was a long way away, standing behind one of the taller gravestones, but even at that distance I thought there was something familiar about him, and I found myself shivering without quite knowing why. He was wearing a full-length coat with gloves and a hat. I couldn’t make out his face. From this distance, it was just a blur. And that was when I realized. I knew exactly where I’d seen him before. I started forward, running toward him. At that moment he turned around and hurried off, moving away from me.

“Nick!” Tim called out.

I ignored him and ran through the cemetery. There was a gravestone in the way and I jumped over it. Maybe that wasn’t a respectful thing to do but I wasn’t feeling exactly religious. I reached the main path and sprinted forward. I didn’t know if Tim was following me or not. I didn’t care.

The northern gates of the cemetery opened onto Old Brompton Road. I burst out and stood there, catching my breath. It came as a shock, coming from the land of the dead into that of the living, with buses and cabs roaring past. An old woman, wrapped in three cardigans, was selling flowers right next to the gate. Business couldn’t have been good. Half the flowers were as dead as the people they were meant for. I went over to her.

“Excuse me . . .” I said. “Did someone just come out through this gate?”

The old woman shook her head. “No, dear. I didn’t see anyone.”

“Are you sure? A man in a long coat. He was wearing a hat . . .”

“People don’t come out of the cemetery,” the old woman said. “When they get there, they stay there.”

A moment later, Tim proved her wrong by appearing at the gate. “What is it, Nick?” he asked.

I looked up and down the pavement. There was nobody in sight. Had I imagined it? No. I was certain. The man I had seen in Joe Carter’s photograph had been in the cemetery less than a minute ago. Once I’d spotted him, he had run away.

But that was impossible, wasn’t it?

If it was Lenny Smile that I had just seen, then who was buried in the grave?

DEAD MAN’S FOOTSTEPS

We began our search for Lenny Smile the next day—at the Battersea offices of the charity he had created.

I knew the building, of course, from the photograph Carter had shown us. Dream Time’s headquarters were above the Café Debussy, which was in the middle of a row of half-derelict shops a few minutes’ walk from the River Thames. It was hard to believe that a charity worth millions of dollars could operate from such a small, shabby place. But maybe that was the point. Maybe they didn’t want to spend the money they raised on plush offices in the West End. It’s the same reason why Oxfam shops always look so run-down. That way they can afford another ox.

But the inside of Dream Time was something else. The walls had been knocked through to create an open-spaced area with carpets that reached up to your ankles and leather furniture you couldn’t believe had started life as a cow. The light fixtures looked Italian. Low lighting at high prices. There were framed pictures on the walls of smiling children from around the world: Asia, Africa, Europe, and so on. The receptionist was smiling, too. We already knew that the place was being shut down, and I could see that she didn’t have a lot to do. She’d just finished polishing her nails when we walked in. While we were waiting she started polishing her teeth.

At last a door opened and Fiona Lee walked in. At least, I guessed it was her. We’d called that morning and made an appointment. She was tall and slim, with her dark hair tied back in such a vicious bun that you’d expect it to explode at any moment. She had the looks of a model, but I’m talking the kind they give away free at McDonald’s. All plastic. Her makeup was perfect. Her clothes were perfect. Everything about her was perfect, down to the last detail. Either she spent hours getting ready every morning, or she slept hanging in the closet so that she didn’t rumple her skin.

“Good morning,” she said. Joe Carter had been right about her. She had such a posh accent that when she spoke you heard every letter. “My name is Fiona Lee.”

We introduced ourselves.

She looked from Tim to me and back again. She didn’t seem impressed. “Do come in,” she said. She spun around on her heel. With heels like hers I was surprised she didn’t drill a hole in the floor.

We followed her down a corridor lined with more smiling kids. At the end was a door that led to an office on a corner, with views of Battersea Park one way and the Thames the other. Rodney Hoover was sitting behind a desk cluttered with papers and half-dead potted plants, talking on the telephone. An ugly desk for a very ugly man. Both of them looked like they were made of wood. He was getting fat and might have been a little less fat if he’d taken up running. He had drooping shoulders and jet-black hair that oozed oil. He was wearing an old-fashioned suit that was too small for him and glasses that were too big. As he finished his call, I noticed that he had horrible teeth. In fact the last time I’d seen teeth like that, they’d been in a dog. Mrs. Lee signaled and we sat down. Hoover hung up. He had been speaking with a strong accent that could have been Russian or German. He had bad breath. No wonder the potted plants on his desk were wilting.

“Good morning,” he said.

“This is Tim Diamond, Mr. Hoover,” Mrs. Lee said. She pronounced his name Teem Day-mond. “He telephoned this morning.”

“Oh yes. Yes!” Hoover turned to Tim. “I am being sorry that I cannot help you, Mr. Diamond.” His English was terrible, although his breath was worse. “Right now, you see, Mrs. Lee and I are closing down Dream Time, so if you have come about your little brother . . .”

“I don’t need charity,” I said.

“We helped a boy like you just a month ago,” Fiona Lee said. She blinked, and her eyelashes seemed to wave goodbye. “He had always wanted to climb mountains, but he was afraid of heights.”

“So did you buy him a small mountain?” Tim asked.

“No. We got him help from a psychiatrist. Then we paid for him to fly to Mount Everest. That little boy went all the way to the top! And although he unfortunately fell off, he was happy. That is the point of our work, Mr. Diamond. We use the money that we raise to make children happy.”

“And take the case of Billy!” Hoover added. He pointed at yet another photograph on the wall. If Dream Time had helped many more kids, they’d have run out of wall. “Billy was a boy who wanted to be a dancer. He was being bullied at school. So we hired some bullies to bully the bullies for Billy and now, you see, Billy is in the ballet!”

“Bully for Billy,” I muttered.

“So how can we be of helping to you, Mr. Diamond?” Hoover asked.

“I have some questions,” Tim said, “about a friend of yours called Lenny Smile.”

Both Rodney Hoover and Fiona Lee froze. Hoover licked his teeth, which couldn’t have been a lot of fun. Fiona had gone pale. Even her makeup seemed to have lost some of its color. “Why are you asking questions about Lenny?” she asked.

“Because that way people give me answers,” Tim replied. “It’s what I do. I’m a private detective.”

There was an ugly silence. I had to say that it suited Rodney Hoover.

“Lenny is dead,” he said. “You know very well that he’s lying there in Brompton Cemetery. Yes? What could you possibly want to know about him?”

“I know he’s dead,” Tim said. “But I’d be interested to know exactly how he died. I understand you were there.”

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